Weakness

yes there have been times, when i've been alone and lonely
she's been my only friend
and times when i've felt unheard and unwanted
she's always lent me her ear
and all those times when i've known i have lost it all to mistrust
i've also known that i can believe in her
times of loss or happiness
i've always needed her
yes i am a weak man
but she is a worthy weakness
many a drink i've sipped with her
she's always gotten me sober
and my times of grief and misery
have always been soaked by her
sometimes i like to be with her for no reason at all
she understands
there are times i've left her
but i always come back
she never complains
even when it seems that i may never return
she waits patiently
sometimes i share her with my friends
but she is happiest with me
though she's never told me in so many words
i know she feels the same
my thoughts are only complete with her by my side
her slow gentle poisonous advances
always allure my mind
but never distract
just force concentration
i use her i know
but i am a weak man and she a worthy weakness
in an ode to her
i thank her for all and more
and blow away her ashen remains
only until i pick on her and light her again
and watch her, help her burn
only to light up my inconsequential existence
i kiss her then
and blow her remains in the air with a soft whistle
then i step on her when she no longer gives me satisfaction
and walk away
never caring where she ends up
a heartless weak man
with a worthy weakness...